Geek Fights

Chris Reads Volume 5: Pretty In Pink

From Wikipedea: "Pretty in Pink" is a song by the English rock band The Psychedelic Furs, originally released in 1981 as a single from the band's second album, Talk Talk Talk. The song inspired the 1986 film of the same name and a re-recorded version of the song was included on the film's soundtrack. Release and reception The original version of "Pretty in Pink" peaked at number 43 on the UK Singles Chart in July 1981.[1] Allmusic writer Bill Janovitz credits producer Steve Lillywhite for finding "the ideal sound for the band, with a perfect blend of classic pop, punk, and art rock elements".[2] Janovitz called it "the definitive take" of the song.[2] Thanks to Greg Blanchard of the Inappropriate Conversations podcast for the suggestion.

Geek Fights Bonus: Best Santa Outtakes

Just in case BEST SANTA wasn't bad enough, we present you the outtakes from that episode. Yep this is the stuff that didn't make the cut. See what Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Allen, Brian Townsend and Josh Vanvalkneborg had to say when they weren't Geek Fighting. You know how the 26th is the day you return the presents you don't want? Well this is like that. Or maybe it's a boxing day thing. I'm not really sure.

Geek Fights 133: Best Santa

Once a year an elderly fat man in red traverses the globe violating airspace and nearly triggering a nuclear holocaust just to bring toys to mostly undeserving children. You know to cover that much ground he must be either traveling at an incredible velocity, risking massive shockwaves or using some sort of warp technology and risking a wormhole implosion that could suck the entire planet into a black hole. All in all a pretty risky endeavor any way you slice it. Sounds like some sort of thrill seeking adrenaline junkie to me. In honor of that spirit, Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Allen, Brian Townsend and Josh Vanvalkenburg bring you BEST SANTA. Ho ho ho. Stuff your stocking with these lovely holday brackets: PDF and Excel format.

Geek Fights Bonus: Best Holiday Special Or Movie Remastered With Commentary

So last year I said we were going to keep releasing out original BEST HOLIDAY SPECIAL OR MOVIE every year, over and over again until you get sick of it, just like all the great holiday specials, and yep we're doing it. But last year we remastered it and added a little bonus material, this year we are presenting the first ever commentary track on one of our episodes. Its Mike Ortiz talking over Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Kathy Lehman, Tess Craft and Allen in his very first Geek Fights appearance. So what will we do to the show next year? Well you are just gonna have to wait a year to find out! You can listen to the original holiday special here. Yoou can listen to the remastered one here.

Geek Fights Bonus: Mail Room Holiday Special

Celebrate Geexmas with this special Happy Holidays from the entire Geek Fights family. Fire up the Country Club Malt Liquor and the Mountain Dew Nog as we take a peek into our mailbag for holiday greetings and more from the whole gang. God Bless Us Everyone!

Chris Reads Volume 4A: Green Eggs & Ham

To help cleanse the pallet of the manifesto he just read, Chris reads a true classic. Green Eggs & Ham by Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr Seuss. It is one of the most beloved books of all time. First published in 1960, its is the 4th best selling english language children's book ever. Even Mike read it during the childhood he didn't have. It's a wonderful fanciful story brought to life by a wonderful fanciful man. Thanks Chris! This is the kind of stuff Chris Reads should be doing. This and erotic slash fiction between Damon and various fictional characters. Seriously where is the Damon/Samwise porn? Maybe combine it with this one. I would not lick them here or there. I would not lick them anywhere. I would not lick Damon's balls and shaft. I do not like them, Samwise-I-laughed. Come on someone finish that...

Chris Reads Volume 4: The Unabomber Manifesto & More

This one is Mike's fault. Ted Kaczynski was a nut. Not the crazy tin foil hat wearing ranting nut, that's fun, but rather a dry, intelligent, academic nut and his manifesto is no different. A thoughtful critique of Industrial Society and Its Future. A deep well thought out, well written dissertation on the economic and social issues of our time that contains many interesting points and a call for change. He then supports it by blowing sh!t up and killing people. Way to Teddy. Listen all the way though, Chris then reads some excellent poetry at the end. He is a sexy man indeed. Please send in some more stuff for Chris to read so he doesn't have to read things like this. I'm sure just posting it got us on a Government watch list, and you are probably on one now just for downloading it. Chris isn't, because he's in the UK. They have cameras everywhere. They're being watched all the time.

Geek Fights 132: Indy Comics Showdown

We've done Marvel, we've done DC, now we turn take a look at the big guns of the little guys. Join Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Jason Thompson, Chris Fiore and Jeremy Sacher as they give you the INDY COMICS SHOWDOWN. It's strange blend of Superman knockoffs, funny animals, murderous children, cops, barbarians and a vampire. And a bunch are Robert Kirkman creations, but none are Battle Pope. Heres that URL for the indy comics Cantankerous Kickstarter project. The brackets are not independent. they are quite dependent. On you!: PDF and Excel format.

Geek Fights 131: Fictional Male You'd Most Like For A Monogamous Relationship

This one is for the ladies!, Join Damon Shaw, Kathy Lehman, Tess Craft, Janet Nowell, Samantha Patino, Kirky Wade, Nikki Nowell, BJ Anderson, Karin, Laura Lavoie and Kate Valdovinos (our biggest panel ever!) as they talk up, the FICTIONAL MALE YOU'D MOST LIKE FOR A MONOGAMOUS RELATIONSHIP. That's a mouthful, and so are these men. Well maybe not Tyrion Lannister or Samwise Gamgee (but you never know, hobbits do have big feet). There' are superheroes, vampires, and a pirate, but there's also a salesman, a lawyer and couple of doctors, because a man's gotta provide, you know! Find out who is the favorite male for our favorite females. It's all about the brackets: the brackets: PDF and Excel format.

Geek Fights 130: Best Of Futurama

Good news everyone, it's time to take a trip to the 31st century with Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Pete Lucas, Yossi Bloch, and Ben McCullough as they take a look at the fine folks of the Planet Express delivery service, in the BEST OF FUTURAMA. Get yourself powered up on booze (or Slurm) and prepare to kiss my shiny metal ass. ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD And of course, the brackets: PDF and Excel format.

Chris Reads Volume 3: Redline Energy Drink Warning Label

Red Bull may give you wings, but Redline Energy Drink may give you wings, a harp and a halo! Joins us as the ever effusive Chris Mitchell reads the terrifying warning label for Redline energy drink. You have been warned. WARNING: listening to this podcast may make you insane.

Geek Fights 129: Best Fight

LET'S GET READY TO RUUUUMBLEEE! Get ready as Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Juan Patino, Anthony and Dan Janes duke it out on BEST FIGHT! Now on Geek Fights, EVERY fight is the best fight, but these are the best of the best. Titanic slugfests from comics, TV and movies. It's got battling robots, ninjas, jedis, unresolved daddy issues, a ton of superman, and a dude punching himself in the face. And it's about Mike fighting everyones childhood. Again. And of course, the brackets: PDF and Excel format.

Geek Fights Bonus: Star Wars: Who Really Shot First

IT'S STAR WARS WEEK. Star Wars week ends as we tackle the greatest Star Wars controversy ever. We all know Han shot first, but George Lucas insists that Greedo shot first. Geek Fights undertook and investigation and found something shocking... This video is for parody purposes. We claim no copyrights to any of this. All copyrights are owned by large well lawyered corporations that would crush us if we implied otherwise. But the more they tighten their grasp, the more videos will slip through their fingers. Damn that's copyrighted too. Skip that last part. I just hope they have a sense of humor. If they strike us down, we will become more powerful than they can possibly imagine. A sparkly blue ghost. Yeah that's copyrighted too. Help us fair use parody exemption, you're our only hope.

Geek Fights 128: Star Wars Showdown

IT'S STAR WARS WEEK! To celebrate here is the second of our Star Wars themes episodes. Join Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Chuck Farrell, Josh Vanvalkenburg and Tristan Riddel as the feel the force with STAR WARS SHOWDOWN. They pit Star Wars characters against one another in mortal combat with...interesting results. Find out the secret of Aunt Beru, who's addicted to Andorian Rape crystals (yes i know Andorians are Star Trek, just go with it) and who is the secret mastermind behind everything. Strap in for Sith lords, bounty hunters and a six foot talking green rabbit. Brackets as always: PDF and Excel format.

Geek Fights Bonus: Star Wars Nitpickers Commentary

IT'S STAR WARS WEEK! Star Wars week begins with Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Chris Mitchell and Allen talking over the original theatrical cut of Star Wars. But this is a nitpicker commentary so they take aim and fire proton torpedoes at every exhaust port they can find. They rip a new hope, a new hole by lovingly exploring every plot problem, contrivance and just plain crazy premise. That's how we show our love here, by tearing it apart! We nitpick because we love.

Chris Reads! Volume 2: Ice Ice Baby

Written by Robert Matthew Van Winkle in 1983 this classic rap song will be pressed into your head by the dulcet tones of the great Chris Mitchell. "Ice Ice Baby" was initially released by Ichiban Records as the B-side to Van Winkle's cover of "Play That Funky Music". The 12-inch single featured the radio, instrumental and a cappella versions of "Play That Funky Music" and the radio version and "Miami Drop" remix of "Ice Ice Baby". When a disc jockey played "Ice Ice Baby" instead of the single's A-side, the song gained more success than "Play That Funky Music". A music video for "Ice Ice Baby" was produced for $8000. The video was financed by Van Winkle's manager, Tommy Quon, and shot on the roof of a warehouse in Dallas, Texas. In the video, Van Winkle is shown rapping the lyrics while he and others dance to the song. Heavy airplay of the video by The Box while Van Winkle was still unknown increased public interest in the song. "Ice Ice Baby" was given its own single, released in 1990 by SBK Records in the United States, and EMI Records in the United Kingdom. The SBK single contained the "Miami Drop", instrumental and radio mixes of "Ice Ice Baby" and the album version of "It's A Party". The EMI single contained the club and radio mixes of the song, and the shortened radio edit. The single was quickly pulled from the American market soon after the song reached number one, in a successful attempt to drive consumers to buy the album instead. Yes I stole all of that from Wikipedia.

Geek Fights 127: Best Of Twin Peaks

Though the darkness of Geek Fights past, Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Jerad Formby, Dave Gill, Christy Wooke and Kate Valdovinos long to see, the BEST OF TWIN PEAKS episode, Fire walk with me. The owls are not what they seem. These brackets, however, are. PDF and Excel format.

Geek Fights 126: Best TV Theme Song

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, of how the world don't move to the beat of just one drum. And sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name, especially if it's Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Chris Mitchell, Joe Cain or Jason Thompson. And they are moving on up to the BEST TV THEME SONG. Someday the Geek Fights might get them but the law never will. Brackets as always: PDF and Excel format.

Geek Fights 125: Best Monster Movie

Our Spooky October concludes with a look at the things that go bump (and crash and slash, and smash) in the night. Join Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Michael Felsher (again? yeah but it's worth it), Amin Amat and Ben McCullough as they discuss the BEST MONSTER MOVIE! There's quite a bit of talk about what constitutes a monster movie, some classic old stuff vs new stuff, and Michael... well you'll see. Brackets as always: PDF and Excel format.

Geek Fights 124: Best Of Stephen King

ALL HAIL THE KING! Our Spooky October continues with a true master of horror (and prison drama apparently). Join Damon Shaw, Mike Ortiz, Michael Felsher (again? WTF is he a co-host now? Should Ortiz be worried after falling asleep last week?), Paul Kowalski, Josh Perrigo,and Lance Langford as they discuss THE BEST OF STEPHEN KING. It's a tale of evil clowns, blood drenched teens, monster dogs, killer trucks, obsessed fans and big black prison messiahs. oh and c*nt. Lots of c*nt. Brackets as always: PDF and Excel format.